Natural Empath

As a natural born empath, I feel “all the things.” Your things… my things… this world’s things.

I wake up… I meditate… I run and sometimes the sh!&storm in my head still pounds on the door of fear and failure, ever so deceitfully trying to slide its way in unnoticed.

Today I invite you to sit where you are and travel to a home within yourself. Bring what hurts, bring your scars and the load that you carry.

Invite in all the raw, vulnerable, scary parts about yourself that you think define your self worth.

Let them stay as they need to. Let them stay until you can feel that the love you give, the health you fight for, and the purpose that drives you… is not wasted time, but an investment.

Get out of your own way today. Stop doubting yourself. Stop halting the battle of your bravery.

Stop not being okay with who you are. Tuck yourself in to a space of love and acceptance. And when you get there, fight like hell to stay.

Onward…

Spiritual Muscles

Spiritual muscles today. Not trying to let in anything that doesn’t serve me. Not trying to let anxieties of the past or future infiltrate in as they often do.

Not trying to be anything today but grateful with a deep presence and appreciation for that which is right now, in this moment.

My feet glide today. My iPod plays songs that resonate both survival and strength. The sun warms my skin and I am reminded of all of the wonderful things that summer brings.

What you are not choosing, you are allowing. I needed this shift today to be more awakened. To be reminded that my deep spiritual needs are the foundation of strength that holds this body together. To let go of what doesn’t matter, and fight for what does.

That. Is. All. 👊🏻

Embrace What You Can’t Understand.

Where are my overthinkers?

On my recovery walk today… my mind starts to overtake me. Back to the same old questions of “Should I have? Can’t I just be like? Is this way wrong?”

Why do we do it to ourselves? I shake my head and breathe.

I remind myself that no matter where this moment leads me, or how this day unfolds, I am exactly where I am meant to be.

Part of growing and seeing success is to remind yourself of the hope that lives in you. Our greatest challenge is often our mind.

I hear the birds… I see the beautiful wildflowers… and they remind me that this day is a gift.

They are natural born survivors, and so are we.

As my mind relaxes… I think of just how lucky I am to be here. How my path is not what I would have chosen but how my purpose proves otherwise.

Sometimes what we do understand is the best nourishment for your soul.

On Being Vulnerable.

Vulnerability is always staying in search of the light. It’s questioning the whys… it’s continual motion toward a direction of your inner truths, and creating an positive impact to those around you.

The in-betweens of the space you are sitting now and where you are headed are often filled with small miracles, daily victories, and subtle moments of learning and triumph.

It’s okay to sit in the gap of uncertainty from time to time, as uncertainty brings about more possibilities for growth.

It’s okay to not tolerate what you once allowed, and fight for a better tomorrow.

Pay attention. Seek to follow those who ignite you. Seek to follow those who give and not just take. Pay attention to acts of selfishness versus acts of selflessness. See in yourself what you want others to see in you.

You are the light… you are the miracle… and you are the force within yourself.

Embrace the hard… and it gets softer. Embrace the doubt… and it gets harder.

Onward.

6 Years Ago Today.

Today is just a random Saturday to many of us. The start of the weekend. A day to sleep in… catch up and make memories.

Six years ago on this day in June after another night of black out drinking… I woke up on a tear-stained pillow realizing change was a must.

I had been down this road before. I had conquered my demons, had challenged booze and won… but had I?

I remember seeing my sneakers laying in the corner, the laces were so bright and beautiful.

My head was pounding. My heart was heavy. My addictive thoughts were already trying to convince me “I don’t need to quit” and to crawl back to the darkness where I was safe from reality, humility, admission, and repair.

I stumbled out of bed, so weak I could barely stand up. Beads of sweat rolled down my face.

I made it to the mirror, and with every amount of strength had left in me… promised myself I would set out to beat this disease, and spend the rest of my days helping those who felt hopeless do the same.

I managed to tie my laces, and go out to the place where my healing journey began… the open road. As I worked the steps of this book… the steps on that asphalt became my best friend.

It listened intently, it spoke to me softly, and it showed my healing and recovery was possible… one run at a time.

Today is just a day to some… but to me, it’s everything.

2,193 days of taking my life back… doing the deep shit work of admitting my own crap, and pushing to become better.

I am forever grateful to the people that took my hand when I was weak, that loved me unconditionally through my worst, and who I still count on today to help me stay accountable.

Like a sunflower, even on my darkest days… I stood to face the light.

Recovery is not only possible… it’s wonderful.

Journal and Reboot Challenge

Good morning! I just finished a killer strength training workout and now will spend some time journaling.

Life is ever changing. Our goals change, our priorities change, our understanding of happenstance and circumstance change.

The older I get, the more I long to be reconnected to a place of familiarity, a place in my being where I know I’ve been, yet have had a hard time reaching it in this fast paced world.

Over the next several weeks, you may not see me post as much. I will be diving into some books that have been eagerly calling my name for months.

I will be writing, and focusing more on meditation and a deeper relationship with my creator, and less on reels and the constant scrolling I do which interrupts my daily productivity.

I encourage those who want to reset and reconnect to take this journey with me.

Buy a journal, buy a book today. Make a plan for better eating habits. Press play on a workout. There are tons of free workouts on YouTube offering any style and fitness level you need.

More importantly, clearing our heads of the constant construction in our minds… news media, garbage posts, and our inner voice negativity. To do this is pivotal to finding peace.

Practice writing daily in the lined pages of your book. Create your story. See how minimizing the need for constant interruptions can quiet the noise in your mind. Do this in the hope of rediscovering the joy we all seem to desperately scroll to find.

Be good to yourself. The past is done, but the future has been waiting patiently.

We want instant results. We want the now gratifications. We want the free gifts, we want the attaboys… but will we compromise to get these?

Do we lose ourselves to find it? Or do we settle in, and focus on what’s been right in front of us the entire time.

It’s amazing how much God will say to me when I just shut up and listen.

Start today. I’ll check in a few days and see how much we are all accomplishing. 💜

The quieter you become… the more you can hear.

Grace and Gratitude

Stay grounded… connect within. Find peace with where you are, and find hope in where you are headed.

You can eat the spinach, drink the water, track the calories, attend the meetings, buy all the things, wear the designer shoes. But not one ounce of that matters if we cannot connect to something higher or greater than ourselves.

Discard immediately what isn’t serving you. Hustle like you mean it… and rid the rotten. This new dawn can bring meaning, and you are capable of cultivating your purpose.

It’s not instant. Gratification is not always instant. Find what works for you… and when you do, hold on tight.

I’ve started my day with what fuels and serves my body the best. Grace and Gratitude today.

What are you grateful for?

Adapt or Transform?

Adapt and Settle? Or Erupt and Transform?

Lay down everything that is conforming you to stagnation.

Pick up your inner reasons, your dreams, and your spirit.

And when the “it’s not worth it”s, the “settle-for”s, and the “it’s not possible”s deliver their speech of fear and resignation…

…tell them I sent you. 👊🏻.

It’s time. Let’s make today into something wonderful.


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Finding Your Gratitude

I’ve been asked about my personal journey with my food and booze addictions numerous times. I’ve been asked what stepping stones, forward movements, side streets, cliff falls, and rising ascents have gotten me where I am today?

One word I have studied… practiced… inhaled and meditated on is gratitude.

Despite my greatest challenges… despite the naysayers, despite ridiculous social norms, and heavy waves of intermittent mind chatter… I am somehow always able to see life’s gifts to me and fuel my quest for wellness and health with gratitude.

These gifts come in the form of people and their belief in me. They come in nature and the simplicity of a beautiful tree or body of water. They come in art, and what my eyes allow me see… and sometimes they present themselves even in the messy things.

The realness and rawness of disappointments and temporary setbacks… even amidst these moments, practicing gratitude within the chaos is what lays the foundation for the granulation of what you must recover from.

There will always be moments of nonsense. Find your gratitude anyway… onward.

~ From the Diary of What Running and Life Have Taught Me


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Arm Yourself with Kindness.

Sometimes when I reflect back, I can’t believe how my journey has unfolded. This is not about what you weigh or what your size is.

I have learned that the representation of a number to our self worth is BS… and being connected and comfortable in our skin comes in beautiful forms of all shapes and sizes.

This is about treating yourself with kindness.

I spent half of my life nearly drinking myself sick. I allowed foods that were not serving me to rule my decisions, and give me a false sense of comfort. I lived in a rat race of comparisons, instead of allowing grace to move in for healing.

On occasion I still may wobble… life sometimes tries to sway me back to a place that I know will leave me empty and without joy.

Arm yourself with kindness. Focus on feeling your best, leading by example. Shut the toxic opinions of others out, and choose what is best for you.

Today the sun is shining. My head is clear. My body is fueled with nutrition that I can pronounce, my coffee is hot, and I’m grateful for another day.

Don’t overthink it. Don’t wish your life away. Don’t false-idol the people who you think have it all. Start simple… be kind to yourself… and be amazed where that takes you.

~ From the Diary of What Running and Life Have Taught Me


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