Category: Transformation

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All Along You Were Blooming

Boundless living is scary. It means waking up early, it means demanding a peaceful mindset.

It means turning the negative chatter off in your head. It means sacrifice when it’s necessary, and doing the work when there is every reason to quit.

It means shaping your future when the cards are stacked against you. It means trying harder. It means tasting your tears, dressing the battle wounds, and starting over every damn day if necessary.

It means moving the vertical structures that are stacked high between you and what your dreams and goals are. It means trusting others and others trusting you. It means building what you want, even when it seems impossible.

From once a broken and lost soul, addicted and miserable… to now the love of endurance running, hiking mountain tops… to writing my heart every day in my blog, to falling into a side hustle I love.

Make no mistake. It’s not by luck or coincidence. It’s not by chance or by happenstance… it’s by determination and challenge… it’s by hope and faith, and by imagination and grace…

All along you were blooming… Today is a good to settle for nothing less that what sparks your soul.

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The Art of Wellbeing

Good Saturday Morning!

It’s not just another day. It’s more than just a shuffle to the coffee pot. It’s not about let’s just exist and pray nothing gets in our way today. 

It’s not the crap on television or fake news. It’s not the stigmas of BS people have so generously placed upon us. It’s not about faking our way through the day and hoping no one sees our struggles, our shortcomings and our setbacks.

It’s about trying to love and accept ourselves even when the mirror and mind are fighting against us. It’s about forgiving what we could not understand and educating ourselves on nutrition and wellness. 

It’s about owning what we could not change and fighting like hell to do something about it.

It’s about trying our best and believing that no matter what… life is begging us to sign a contract with renewal, and hope, with faith and freedom.

You are enough. Today, tomorrow, and forever. Time to fly.

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Time Capsule

There are 40 years between these two pictures of myself. As most of us do periodically, I sit back in awe of how quickly time goes… and I continue to ask myself, why am I here?

There are 40 years of experience in these pictures. Forty years of ups and downs, victories and losses. Forty years of trying to discover what my greater purpose is. What is it that sets me apart?

But furthermore, why is my drive to aid people in overcoming their own personal challenges, addictions, and maladies so important to me?

The time spent in between these pictures tells a story of survival, sadness, setbacks determination, perseverance; and most importantly, joy. The roads and pavements of my traveled feet have guided me back to a life I look forward to. The gentle mobility of one foot in front of the other, the quiet push of excitement in my heart feeling alive, have had a restorative effect on my gross wellbeing.

I stare back at that little girl, and wish I could have prepared her for so many of the unforeseen days of disappointments, life’s struggles, and internal tugs of war.

She didn’t know as she was folding her hands in anticipatory excitement, that she would have to battle alcohol and food addiction, and unforeseen trauma. She didn’t know then that it wasn’t her fault, and that God’s plan was so much greater than she ever could have imagined.

Forty years later, I am thriving, and I am well. I know the plans that have been made for me are immense and full of goodness. My dream of helping you will not falter, or be dismounted. My drive to continue to be a wellness influencer, and motivational speaker keeps me alive with determination and intention.

I am a force that’s not easily tamed, I am grateful, and above all… I am living proof that re-birth is not only possible but, wondrous. Now let’s go find some joy…

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No Limit.

There is no limit to re-inventing yourself. There is no limit to the vast possibility of change for you. There is no limit to how you can affect the lives of others. 

There is no limit to how a small amount of kindness can change a person’s day. There is no limit for striking a match of hope in a world so broken. 

There is no limit for growth, and there is no limit on how your words can literally heal the pain of someone else.

Being an empath is tough sometimes. I take on the feelings of others. I want so badly for you to overcome your personal obstacles. 

I want health for you. I want you to heal from your traumas, and low self esteem. I want you to become a better athlete, co-worker, friend, parent, or partner.

Your health and wellness journey is an investment. The courage you need to rid yourself of nonsense is already within you. Pull the plug on the radio of life that continually plays a song of failure and skepticism.

There is no limit. There is no greater time than now. Find what works for you and help yourself help others. 

I am continually thankful and surprised at how much I continue to learn and be successful in my own health and wellness quest.

There is no limit… did ya hear that?

Amen.

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Joyride to Journey

She was a mix of so many ingredients. The batter she swirled around daily inside her wasn’t always pretty, or without messes. It wasn’t always without clumps of regret that needed smoothing, nor without constant effort to seek a better end result.

What it was though… was consistent even when she doubted. And when fear choked her of seeing a bright future… she poured her batter anyway.

I don’t know about you, but the older I get, the more I realize the essence of my timeline here on earth. I softly remember things that hurt, that drove me to change… but I boldly look toward what I am meant for.

And as for my purpose, once clouded but which is now becoming crystal… running the Boston Marathon, building a side business, and the compassionate drive to help those who are lost, lonely and addicted… can’t be accomplished by wishing, and daydreaming.

Sweat and scars, time, and tangible efforts get me there. We are only here for a blink of an eye. Our journey is a tale of our struggles, our whys, our deeper need, and our promise of hope.

It took me 40-plus years to realize the importance of enjoying my journey. Ten years ago, I was 90 pounds overweight, shooting whiskey, and allowing toxic things to erode me from inside out.

I don’t have all the answers, I can’t explain all the happenstances. But I can say this: ponder what it is that’s stopping you from your potential. Discard it, release it, flush it.

Time waits for no one. It’s time to take a joyride 💛.

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The Art of Alignment

Did you ever wake up and think how did I get here? What is life trying to teach me? And why must I stay on this path? For me, this is something I ponder with curiosity almost daily.

As I always try to move forward with Integrity and Intention… my mind wanders back to “all the things.” The whys and ways of my old life. The demand to myself of changing my habits and body. The rawness of exposing my booze addition, my previous obesity, and the hallway of self-sabotage I was trapped in.

The efforts of searching and trusting what nutrition I choose and what supplements I will make a priority in taking are all things that as I age and gain wisdom… become of utmost importance. Alignment happens when we stay in agreement with ourselves… not the wishes of others!

Alignment happens when we pray, we manifest, and we know that the people, friends, acquaintances you are connected with are pivotal in reaching your dreams and goals. The sport I love more than almost anything, has connected me with the most amazing humans. Hard work, grit, sacrifice, kindness, are just the tip of what we have in this community.

Whether you are a runner, walker, swimmer, biker, hiker, yoga teacher, friend, family member, or just along to learn and grow… know your purpose is important, the language of life you speak will be the enlaced in your legacy.

We all hide from reality. We don’t like to talk about the hard and messy things. We believe we can do it alone, we choose mediocrity every time. Find time for readjustment and alignment. Work hard to hustle for what you know is yours and claim the possibility of loving life.

I will be looking for those ready to align with me… to take chances, and discuss visions of only goodness, wholeness and wellness. We can’t do it alone… but together, we can rise 💛. May your attention be on your alignment and may only goodness cover you.

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Can We Do Better?

I look at this triad that stares back at me and still to this day am unsure of its unfolding. I peer into the eyes of that little girl named Suzanne. 

Dreams of a 7-year-old are quite simple… the fairytales of my princess room seemed so life-like and doable. The genuineness to travel to space, meet my celebrity crush, and care for my baby doll as if her literal life depended on it, kept me smiling and full of life.

The adult years slapped me in the face with a darkness I wasn’t prepared for. The unforeseen devil in the bottle of whiskey, the lies of processed shit food, being overweight, and the hidden agenda of my mind… were to continually taunt me, shame me, and unravel every little good thing I wanted to believe about myself.

Today you will find me on solid ground, but with dreams that soar, and a heart that’s been mended. This didn’t come without tough lessons, steadfast trust, and a pair of sneakers. Those worn out treads have carried me miles and miles.

Running gave me purpose. It befriended me at my lowest, and has taken me to my highest. It never sways, it never says…”‘no you can’t”, it’s not partial to day or night, it doesn’t care what I look like, or what I wear. It just shows up when I need it… and guides me one step at a time. It listens without judgement, and it believes in me.

Running helped me break the chains, and fight for a new existence. It instructed me to do better. We all have crap in our mental closets. We stuff it away, we drink it down, we purge it up… over and over. 

What if we just do better? Don’t wait until tomorrow. Don’t excuse yourself to repeating patterns. Do better. Do something. Do it until you see that 7-year-old’s innocence again… and when you see her, tell her she was right. You can be anything your heart desires. The end.

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“New Year, New You”

Sleepless nights. Tossing and turning. Hating my choices. Angry at where life “put me.” Feelings of low self esteem. Daily wars with my inner self. HATE. EAT. DRINK. REPEAT.

That was my life for years, only I did it in silence so I could isolate myself from penetrating words, good people, and the truth.

It wasn’t until the long distance sport of running taught me to be tougher than my demons. It taught me patience, and endurance. 

It taught me humbleness, and mercy. It taught me that a little daily discipline, coupled with passion, and a good diet could be the answer to unlocking the door and leaving my living hell, and a hell I chose to stay in far too long.

We all hear the same crap. “It’s a New Year, New You”… “Start tomorrow, today is over.” “I’m going to do it… just not today.” 

I’m here to tell you: today counts. This minute counts. You don’t need a new month, or new turn of the numbers to give you permission to become your greatest self. Our addictions, the errors of our ways, and our poor choices can only thrive if we allow them to.

Be done with your own crap. Take the good advice you give others but never follow yourself. Make YOU a priority, don’t over complicate it. Eat a vegetable, drink more water, and let your story tell itself.

Somewhere today someone is watching you. Be a good teacher, and be a kind human. That. Is. All.

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Rebirth

I awoke to a song faintly playing in my head: “The sun will come out tomorrow...“ Without much thought about it, I shot up to start my day. I went straight to the coffee maker and opened the unending cabinet of another addiction of mine… too many mugs!

There she was, staring at me. I carefully placed the mug down and began to think about this beautiful symbol’s meaning: healing, and a source of life.

This year is about to end. We have faced continued trying times… personal struggle, and world wide fatigue and crisis. I am tired, I am sometimes weary, I fight my daily battles. Yet each day, I begin with Hope.

I have dreams, and plans so big they can’t begin to fit on that lined notebook paper. I have athletic goals, and pipe dreams that are laughable to many… but to me are the very things that keep me sane, healthy, and appreciating health and wellness.

I refuse to carry the heavy BS into the New Year. It weighs a ton, reeks of self intoxication, and it’s not worth once of what defines me.

This time of year is made for re-birth. It is made for healing, for loving the people who make you better, and for leaving behind those who don’t.

Sip and be well. And remember, “The sun will come out tomorrow.”

Heal, restore, re-birth. Amen.

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Graceful Exit.

I hear the clock ticking. The second hand makes known how much time is left before I say goodbye to 2021, and prepare to develop, grow, and thrive in the next 365 days.

To exit something gracefully is a challenge, and for many of us, implies multiple meanings. It can mean we must let go of the thing that has weighed so heavy on us… not altering its validity, not denying its lesson or importance… but simply and painstakingly cutting the cord of what is preserving bitterness in order to end the madness.

For some, it may be exiting a toxic relationship or friendship, where finally the tight grasp that a certain person once had over you has loosened just enough to be set free.

We all carry the power to battle our mental hijackers and spiritual strongholds. We all tolerate things that are beyond ludicrous. We condone, we consume, and we swallow the negative backwash of others. Exit gracefully, intentionally leave behind the baggage, and arrive at the new starting line of life.

For me this year has had its rolling hills. I’ve had tears, I’ve had smiles wider than canyons, and I’ve had sadness that aches to the core… but it’s kept its promise. It has made me a better athlete, a better friend, and has given me more insight to understand what I want and what I will demand for my continued becoming.

Exit this year gracefully… bow your head in thanks, raise your hand not your white flag, and run into the New Year with a blank canvas.

Who will you be in 2022? What will you accomplish? Who and what you take with you and who and what you leave behind will impact your results. Stop being okay with what’s not okay.

May we all find our balance, exit gracefully, and land ever so softly to new beginnings.

#runningmotivation#RUNBEFOREYOUFLY#exitthematrix

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