Inhale Courage, Exhale Fear

She awoke one day in her usual frame of mind. Her head pounded from booze the prior night. The processed crap she had eaten just before laying down did not comfort her as promised… only left her feeling more empty and digusted.

She slightly remembered her repeated promise to herself only hours before that someday things would be different.

Fear roared louder and louder, telling her she wasn’t strong enough to change. Fear invited itself in to set up camp in her mind, expecting to stay for the long haul without question or hesitation.

Courage had other plans, and waited ever so patiently to surface. Courage held her hand and led her inward.

“We’re going deep,” Courage whispered… “We may be gone a while. But when we come, back fear will no longer live here.”

“Are you sure I’m ready?” she mouthed.

Courage took a big inhale and said:

“We’ve waited our whole life for this moment. Onward, Love… the end. 🌸🌷🌿.

What fear is holding you back today? Inhale… exhale… onward.

#hopedealer #inhalecourageexhalefear #wegotthistogether

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Autumn of Reproach.

Fall is a season of reproach for me. I tuck away the things summer has taught me. I welcome the rustling leaves, the vibrant colors, and dare to dream all that is meant for me in this season.

When Autumn awakes… so does my heart. I allow the sun to take a step back… but my inner strength and yearning to take a step forward. I think of all the gifts that I am given daily. I am thankful in a season of accomplishment, and yet seek excitement for the next place my journey will land me.

I am learning that everything happens in God’s time, that I was woven and spun for his greatest good, and that experiences both awful and wonderful have helped to shape and mold me into the best version of myself that I can be.

Never doubt your internal longing to be greater, continue to question things that are bullshit, and do not settle for anything other than what gives you peace.

Let today be the start of your unveiling. The best is yet to come.

Follow along as Suzanne Swanson takes us through her transformation from addiction to athlete. Find support and healing in your own life! We’re sending Suzanne’s blog updates via email along with a daily dose of motivation. Don’t miss the next post… delivered straight to your inbox.

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Show Your Face to the Morning.

Some of us today will wake up with a sense of uncertainty.

We will walk down the hall with the same inner conflict we have every day since we can remember.

Some of us will wake up today hungover, ashamed and with a deep disgust within ourselves that we yet again let substance win over our truest longing for sobriety.

Some of us will wake up hiding the cookie package, crumpling the chip bag, hearing the screams of defeat echo that “you’ll always be fat and unhealthy.”

One of us will have woken up after standing up to a bully, deciding that today they will no longer have power over you.

One of us will have prayed for the first time ever… hoping for just one miracle teetering on the brink of a rock bottom.

One of us will wake up and draw the curtains open for the first time in a decade… unsure if the anxiety will let them outside for even just a minute.

One of us will need a friend today. One of us will have a huge victory, and of us will no doubt have a setback.

Whomever you are, wherever you are… draw the shades, let the light in, let the bad shit out. Own it, claim it, trust it, and move through it.

Rise on up… show your face to the morning.

Show up uninvited to all the places within you trying to hold you back. Today matters, and so do you 🌻.

Choose Happy.

For those of you struggling to seek self-joy or self-empowerment… here goes it.

Our power within awakens each day with us. It is our thoughts that can destroy us. Choose happy on purpose. Choose balance.

Choose flexibility over rigidity. I remember asking myself… Why me?

I asked that question a thousand times… until I got still enough to really seek the answer. My struggles, my hurts, my lot in life was a tool. A tool to teach me grace, humility, strength, and freedom.

Negative people suck. Naysayers, manipulators, and evil doers are at every corner, every stop light, every open door we enter through. Greet them with a few things they can’t stand: contentment, happiness, and a heart full of joy☀️.

Challenges come, but be victorious in today. Clear your mind, have a little talk with your thoughts, and be better…

Unstoppable.

This week has been a week of deep thought, release and reproach. Forgiveness of myself is something I’m often reluctant to strive for.

As disciplined as I am, it’s easy for to me to be to set in my ways, too hard on myself, and too one-sided in many areas of thinking.

This week I set some new goals for myself.

I promised myself more journaling time. I challenged myself to see a difficult situation in a forgiving light instead of an angered one.

I enjoyed some foods I usually scold myself for having… I allowed myself to loosen the lid of the pressure cooker of life.

There are familiar places, smells, sounds, and landscapes that enter my mind often and take me back to a time of comfort, peace, and solace. This week I reminded myself that to get to this place, I need to paddle with the current… not against it.

Be the love… be unstoppable… be understanding… be available for all the things that make you happy.

Don’t get caught in the riptide. Do not go against the flow, but work with the current to get you upstream to the destination of your dreams…

Be the Change

💙BE THE CHANGE💙… This morning as I was lacing up to head out and enjoy the gift God has afforded me… I thought about something very important: the power of our words.

I can’t post names for obvious reasons of confidentiality… but I want to share this…

To the woman who sent me a private message yesterday, admitting for the first time that alcohol is overtaking her…. don’t give up. I have stood where you stand…. there is hope 💙.

To the person who private messaged me yesterday feeling the lack of self-worth and confidence to stand up to her own enemies… I have stood where you stand… there is hope. 💙

To the brave soul that messaged me yesterday who stepped on the scale for the first time in a year, feeling depressed, defeated, but with a new sense of purpose she hadn’t felt in a while… I have stood where you stand… there is hope.💙

To the man who has recently shared some of his life with me, the pain of not wanting to live, the deep hurts of overthinking, and wanting to numb himself from this world… thank you for revealing a part of you with me… and yes, there is hope 💙.

Our words our powerful. Kindness is free, and lending a helping hand can change the world… literally… one person at a time.

I don’t have all the answers. I struggle, I sit with heavy things, too.

I fear, I pray, I contemplate, I hope, I trust, I love. You want to see a better world? Then stop complaining and let’s “Be the change.”💙

This run is for the wonderful people who have touched my heart… you know who you are.

Now let’s get it!

Run and Be Happy!

For me to become a better athlete, and keep churning at the handle of my personal and professional goals, to ensure my sobriety, and integrity… I need to always meditate to put life in its proper position.

Conflicting thoughts on nutrition, running gear, beauty products, financial plans, life strategies can cause massive chaos to our thoughts if we allow it.

People will always show up on your doorstep of life to inflict their opinions or “two cents” of *their* being into *yours.* Do not allow such individuals to interfere with the trajectory of your journey.

We face adversity together. We can get through uncertainties by the hands and bodies of our personal experiences, and by our very own truths we have allowed others to view.

When the road is bumpy, stay on it.

When you feel like you can’t run, walk, or jog another inch… go three inches. When you see the walls crumbling… believe that when that wall falls, it leaves a new space for unimaginable growth you never thought possible.

Today I am grateful what each of you bring to the table. Your stories, your jokes, your humility, your honesty, your progresses, your setbacks.

All teach us that we are listening…and we can overcome. We all motivate differently. We think differently, we run differently… we set different goals, and that is okay.

Today’s meditation brought up some superior points. Just do your best… don’t be a shitty human being… and never stop being who you are. 🖤

16 Miles and Smiles.

She looked softly in the mirror at the woman she once was.

She forgave herself for all the lies she told and believed about her beautiful soul.

She made food her friend… using it to heal and fuel her body.

She said goodbye to her booze addiction that betrayed her beyond measure, but not without letting it see how much good she has used it to teach the world that healing and recovery are possible.

This morning she woke at 4:45 am to run 16 miles. She is disciplined. She is strong. She is kind. She is me.


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Run for Humanity.

Today I run for our soldiers. For our heroes. For our men and women who have given tirelessly and relentlessly for my freedom and for my protection.

Today I run for this world, and how unbelievably broken it is. I run for those weary, and struggling. For those who are broken and sick. I run for our forefathers and what they fought for. I run for humanity and kindness for all humankind, of all skin colors, ethnicities, and race.

I run for peace, and to ignite unity. I run to understand ignorance and to pray for patience. I run for to seek clarity of a world that I admit I am sometimes fearful of and disgusted by.

I run today for this land that I love. Thank you, heroes… military, fire, police, first responders, doctors, nurses, pastors, truck drivers, clerks, gas station attendants, teachers, waitresses, waiters, lineman, mental health counselors, and everyone else who I didn’t mention…

I RUN FOR US ALL TODAY. May we continue to love, to be kind humans, and may our spirits be filled with a united love for all mankind…❤️💙🇺🇸.

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Metamorphosis

Metamorphosis…

As a child, I was carefree, with a zest for life. I didn’t know about responsibility then, or have worry. I didn’t understand the concept of adulthood, paying bills, raising children. I didn’t know about the harshness of cruel people, who the taxman or bill collector was, or that I would soon walk the road to darkness.

In my early to late adulthood, I was taught the hard lessons of love, the fear of crippling anxiety, the sadness of the battle with the bottle, the raw truth of feeling less than.

I felt the defeat of being overweight, the sadness of lack of joy, and had an overwhelming dreaded falseness that I could not become who that little girl on the left dreamed of.

In my midlife, I found the love of running… and today I inhale gratitude with each breath.

I welcome joy, I preach hope. I tell the booze to shut up and lay down. I make my choices. I decide who stays and who goes, and I will choose peace over bullshit every time.

Faith leads the way. Hope lights the path, and perseverance steps you there.

Take a step… take a breath… and find your way to your metamorphosis 🖤.

#hopedealer #IAintDoneYet

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